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<channel>
	<title>Boltvault</title>
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	<link>http://www.boltvault.com</link>
	<description></description>
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			<item>
		<title>Holly McGuire</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/holly-mcguire</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/holly-mcguire#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Feb 2010 16:12:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boltvault babe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fashion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[glamour]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lingerie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[page 3]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Swimwear]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1904</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Welcome Holly McGuire, likes spending time with friends and family, but then likes the wild nights out! Essex based Hollys stats are 32f-24-34
Name: Holly Mcguire
Location: Essex
Measurements: 32f-24-34
Height: 5ft5
Eye Colour: Dark Brown
Hair Colour/Length: Blonde/Mid Length (am growing it long)
Shoe size: 4
Dress Size: 8-10
Experience (work that is!)
What type of modelling have you done so far? Swimwear, Lingerie, [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/holly-mcguire/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>DR. QUIMM&#8217;S GUIDE TO KNOWING YOUR POO</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimms-guide-to-knowing-your-poo</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimms-guide-to-knowing-your-poo#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 26 Jan 2010 21:37:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bill Murray]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bum Gravy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chemical Ali]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Deidre Barlow]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ghost]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guinness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Home Alone]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Iraq]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kurds]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Log Flume]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Macauley Culkin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mr. Whippy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Orgasm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Paxo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sea Wolf]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Submarine]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Sun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Usain Bolt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[World War II]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1840</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hi, I’m resident Boltvault physician Dr. Julian Quimm and welcome to the first of my series of medical missives designed to help you recognise the tell-tale signs of illness or injury.
In my surgery today, I’m going to teach you a valuable lesson; a lesson which could save you hours of pain, suffering and embarrassment.
Put quite [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimms-guide-to-knowing-your-poo/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Vikki-Gabrielle Holt</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/vikki-gabrielle-holt</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/vikki-gabrielle-holt#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 25 Jan 2010 17:03:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boltvault babe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fashion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[glamour]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[model]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nude]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vikki-Gabrielle Holt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[West Yorkshire]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1836</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Welcome to our West Yorkshire babe, Vikki! One of our questions is "strangest place you’ve ever had sex?" Vikki's reply was "beside the motorway", we really want to hear about this, was she broken down? Vikki's ideal night out is a good meal and some RnB, likes to keep fit (as we can see).
Name: Vikki-Gabrielle [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/vikki-gabrielle-holt/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Interview with a PUA</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/interview-with-a-pua</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/interview-with-a-pua#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 09:50:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Interviews]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[direct game]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[direct seduction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[meeting women]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pick up artist]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[PUA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[the game]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1819</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[What is a 'PUA'? 
PUA stands for “Pick up artist”. A man who is so good at picking up women its almost an “art”. There are various definitions; it’s even on Wikipedia. Put simply a PUA is a man who has skills that give him an advantage over regular guys when it comes to chatting [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/interview-with-a-pua/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>STAR WARS PULP FICTION</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/star-wars-pulp-fiction</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/star-wars-pulp-fiction#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 07:00:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bruce Willis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[C3PO]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Carrie Fisher]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chewbacca]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Han Solo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Harrison Ford]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jabba The Hutt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mark Hamill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pulp fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[star wars]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tarrantino]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uma Thurman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ving Rhames]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1783</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is another in the series of fantastic edits where images of Star Wars have been mixed with other movies and in our opinion, it's one of the best.
Star Wars and Pulp Fiction - genius!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/star-wars-pulp-fiction/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>BOOGIE NIGHTS MIX</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/boogie-nights-mix</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/boogie-nights-mix#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 20 Jan 2010 11:00:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Boogie Nights]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chewbacca]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dirk Diggler]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Han Solo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mark Wahlberg]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Princess Leia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[star wars]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1789</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Take a dash of Dirk Diggler, a pinch of Han Solo, a drizzle of Luke Skywalker and a large portion of theme music and you've got the perfect recipe for a Star Wars / Boogie Nights mix!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/boogie-nights-mix/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>MOUSE HELD ON CELEBRITY HAIR THEFT CHARGES</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/mouse-held-on-celebrity-hair-theft-charges</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/mouse-held-on-celebrity-hair-theft-charges#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 20 Jan 2010 10:23:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Celebrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bruce Forsythe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Brucie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrities]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Heathrow]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[L'oreal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Play your cards right]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[You bet]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1811</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man down the nick, John Bollocks
Police have today apprehended a mouse at Heathrow airport on charges of theft and the suspected trafficking of celebrity human hair. Bertram Mouse, 24 of no fixed abode was arrested by airport police acting on a tip-off as he attempted to board a flight to Kazakhstan, reputedly a [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/mouse-held-on-celebrity-hair-theft-charges/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>EYE OF THE TIGER</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/eye-of-the-tiger</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/eye-of-the-tiger#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 20 Jan 2010 08:36:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Comedy Vault]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheese]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Eye of the tiger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[I'm on the top of the world]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mouse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nolan's Cheddar]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Carpenters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[This is the end]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1807</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Very funny, and all about cheese - you can't go wrong!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/eye-of-the-tiger/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>STAR WARS AIRWOLF</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/star-wars-airwolf</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/star-wars-airwolf#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 18 Jan 2010 08:00:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[80's]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[airwolf]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[military helicopter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[star wars]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1778</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Another trip back to the 80's where we see clips from the movie legend that is Star Wars mixed with the opening titles of hi-tech helicopter adventure series, Airwolf.
This is brilliant!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/star-wars-airwolf/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>PROBLEMS PUTTING OUT</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/problems-putting-out</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/problems-putting-out#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Jan 2010 22:13:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[headache]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kojak]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[London]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pooper]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[skin flicks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tiredness]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1801</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ 
Dear Dr Quimm,
My boyfriend is always pestering me to have sex with him. It doesn't matter what time of the day or night it is, he always wants to sleep with me.
What can I do as I'm worried this sort of pressure will ruin our relationship?
Abi Daysarehereagain,
London
Dr. Quimm says:
Are you wasting my time or what? [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/problems-putting-out/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>ITALIAN CLASSIC</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/italian-classic</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/italian-classic#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Jan 2010 21:39:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Car Chase]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mafia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michael Caine]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mini]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Italian Job]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Turin]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1794</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[As iconic movie lines go, this one is right up there.
It's 1969 and Michael Caine has amassed a band of crooks to pull of the crime of the decade - to steal a truck load of gold bullion from right under the noses of the Mafia.
Add in some Mini's, one of the best car chases [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/italian-classic/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>A-TEAM STAR WARS</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/a-team-star-wars</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/a-team-star-wars#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Jan 2010 13:25:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Anthony Daniels]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[C3PO]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chewbacca]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Han Solo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Harrison Ford]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Luke Sywalker]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mark Hamill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[star wars]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The A Team]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1770</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Ever wondered what would happen if you took the legendary 80's soldiers of fortune series The A-Team and mixed it with a dash of the original Star Wars trilogy? Well this is it folks, one of the best trailers you'll ever see. Pure genius!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/a-team-star-wars/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>WOMEN MORE LIKELY TO GIVE BIRTH THAN MEN &#8211; OFFICIAL</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/women-more-likely-to-give-birth-than-men-official</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/women-more-likely-to-give-birth-than-men-official#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Jan 2010 11:38:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Arnold Schwarzenegger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cambridge]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ghostbusters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hollywood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ivan Reitman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Junior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pregnancy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[University]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1759</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man in the delivery room, John Bollocks
A new study undertaken by Cambridge University to be published next week claims that women are a staggering 100% more likely to give birth than men.  The study which was commissioned by the British Medical Association (BMA), ran tests over a 10 year period to see whether [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/women-more-likely-to-give-birth-than-men-official/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>HOSPITALS OVERWHELMED FOLLOWING LIVERPOOL DEFEAT. RIB INJURIES INCREASE TENFOLD</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/hospitals-overwhelmed-following-liverpool-defeat-rib-injuries-increase-tenfold</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/hospitals-overwhelmed-following-liverpool-defeat-rib-injuries-increase-tenfold#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 14 Jan 2010 16:16:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dr]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[GP]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Liverpool]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Manchester]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Premier League]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rafa Benitez]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1752</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man in surgical gloves, John Bollocks.
 
Hospitals across the country have been under siege by an influx of patients complaining of rib injuries. The epidemic is said to have started shortly after the final whistle blew at Anfield as Liverpool were knocked out of the FA Cup in their replay against Reading.
 
Dr. Rick Shaw [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/hospitals-overwhelmed-following-liverpool-defeat-rib-injuries-increase-tenfold/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>ROSS ANNOUNCES NEW TV PLANS</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/ross-announces-new-tv-plans</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/ross-announces-new-tv-plans#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 08 Jan 2010 16:22:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Celebrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BBC]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gordon Ramsay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jonathan Ross]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Katie Price]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Katy Perry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Russell Brand]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wossy]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1715</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By chief showbiz correspondent, Snooper van Minge.
Following his announcement yesterday that he was quitting the BBC after 13 years; Jonathan Ross has today announced plans for a new TV show which will also feature friend and comedian Russell Brand. Speaking to fans on his Wossy Twitter page, Ross described how his new show will feature [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/ross-announces-new-tv-plans/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>OXFORD MAN HELD ON VOYEUR CHARGES</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/oxford-man-held-on-voyeur-charges</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/oxford-man-held-on-voyeur-charges#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 08 Jan 2010 13:05:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kidlington]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Oxford]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Police]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1699</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man twitching behind the curtains, John Bollocks.
Police were called to a house in upper crust Kidlington, Oxfordshire last night, to arrest an alleged pervert. The alarm was raised by neighbours who heard screaming emanating from a house in The Broadway area of the village. On entry to the address, police were alarmed to [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/oxford-man-held-on-voyeur-charges/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NEW ELECTION POLICIES UNVEILED</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/new-election-policies-unveiled</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/new-election-policies-unveiled#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Jan 2010 16:21:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Conservative]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[David Cameron]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[General Election]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gordon Brown]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Labour]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lib Dem]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nick Clegg]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Policies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tory]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Westminster]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1683</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man in Westminster, John Bollocks.  
As the build up to a General Election starts to hot up, the major parties have today unveiled the policies they hope will see them elected. This morning Tory leader David Cameron told waiting journalists his party would be adopting a radical new ‘Name Calling’ policy which he [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/new-election-policies-unveiled/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>IT’S SNOW JOKE! LATEST TERROR PLOT UNCOVERED</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/it%e2%80%99s-snow-joke-latest-terror-plot-uncovered</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/it%e2%80%99s-snow-joke-latest-terror-plot-uncovered#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 05 Jan 2010 21:08:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Iraq]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MI5]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mr. Frosty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Muff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scotland]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[snow]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[terror plot]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tit]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weather]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1662</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man with his hands in a muff, John Bollocks.
MI5 has today revealed the cold snap which has seen the UK grind almost to a standstill in recent days, is the result of the latest fiendish terror plot by Islamic extremists. A spokesman for the security service, Tom Tit, claimed that a terror cell [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/it%e2%80%99s-snow-joke-latest-terror-plot-uncovered/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Elise</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/elise</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/elise#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 04 Jan 2010 19:16:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blonde]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boltvault babe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Elise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Essex]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1650</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Welcome Essex based Elise - proud owner of one of the top 10 British bum's! Elise loves clubbing and drinking Malibu and Coke and also likes swimming pool changing rooms...
Name: Elise
Location: Essex
Measurements: 30E-24-34
Height: 5'5
Eye Colour: blue/green
Hair Colour/Length: blonde, waist length (all natural)
Shoe size: 5
Dress Size: 8/10
Experience (work that is!) Absolutely loads, but still not enough! lol
What [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/elise/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Amber Hughes</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/amber-hughes</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/amber-hughes#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 03 Jan 2010 16:26:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[amber hughes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boltvault babe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[topless]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1644</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Welcome Amber Hughes, our Plymouth-based beauty who enjoys being a DJ, likes JD, a sexy outfit and hot girlfriends. Fast cars have been mentioned a couple of times too! Please, read on...
Name: Amber Hughes
Location: Plymouth - Green Army!
Measurements: 30c -26 - 36
Height: 5'4
Eye Colour: Grey / Blue
Hair Colour/Length: Long, blonde
Shoe size: 6
Dress Size: 8/10
Experience (work [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/amber-hughes/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Obama Alien Defense</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/obama-alien-defense</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/obama-alien-defense#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:41:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Web Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[President Obama]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1609</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[President Obama defends the world from an alien invasion!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/obama-alien-defense/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Wordo</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/wordo</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/wordo#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:39:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Web Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Games]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1607</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Clear the board of letters by spelling words!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/wordo/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Snowboard Madness</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/snowboard-madness</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/snowboard-madness#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:37:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Web Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Games]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1605</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Strive to be the best as you ride the mountains.

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/snowboard-madness/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Deluxe Pool</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/deluxe-pool</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/deluxe-pool#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:35:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Web Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pool]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1603</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Use the pool cue to shoot and pocket the billiard balls.

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/deluxe-pool/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Police Chopper</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/police-chopper</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/police-chopper#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:33:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Web Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[police chopper]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1601</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Use your skills as an elite Police Chopper pilot to serve the city.

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/police-chopper/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Shootin&#8217; Hoops</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/shootin-hoops</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/shootin-hoops#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:26:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Web Games]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Shootin' Hoops]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1598</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Get past the other players and shoot a basket to win.


]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/shootin-hoops/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NEW GOVERNMENT PLANS ON CLIMATE CHANGE ANNOUNCED &#8211; &#8216;KILL THEM ALL&#8217; SAY MINISTERS</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/new-government-plans-on-climate-change-announced-kill-them-all-say-ministers</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/new-government-plans-on-climate-change-announced-kill-them-all-say-ministers#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Nov 2009 10:50:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[carbon footprint]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CO2 emissions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Selina Clownspocket]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Westminster]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1480</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our woman in Westminster, Selina Clownspocket.
The government has today announced revolutionary new plans to cut CO2 emissions and reduce the UK’s carbon footprint. Following a two-year study by the University of Leamington Spa, Government ministers have revealed that a cull of old people and cows will begin in 2010 in an attempt to reduce [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/new-government-plans-on-climate-change-announced-kill-them-all-say-ministers/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The must have cleaning product of the year</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/new-from-boltvault-%e2%80%93-the-must-have-cleaning-product-of-the-yearnew-from-boltvault-%e2%80%93-the-must-have-cleaning-product-of-the-year</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/new-from-boltvault-%e2%80%93-the-must-have-cleaning-product-of-the-yearnew-from-boltvault-%e2%80%93-the-must-have-cleaning-product-of-the-year#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Nov 2009 08:42:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Ads]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cillit Bang]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[knobheads]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1471</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Fed up with the sight of unsightly stains on humanity?
Want to say goodbye to nasty irritations?
Unable to remove those annoying Grimes from your TV every Saturday night?
Well look no further!
The boffins at Bolvault Industry in association with Cillit Bang have come up with the definitive product to meet all your cleaning needs!
NEW CILLIT GRIMES REMOVER!
 
 

Wave goodbye [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/new-from-boltvault-%e2%80%93-the-must-have-cleaning-product-of-the-yearnew-from-boltvault-%e2%80%93-the-must-have-cleaning-product-of-the-year/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>EXCLUSIVE! JEDWARD IN CAN’T SING SHOCK</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-jedward-in-can%e2%80%99t-sing-shock</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-jedward-in-can%e2%80%99t-sing-shock#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Nov 2009 08:51:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jedward]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John and Edward]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[X Factor twins]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1465</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man with a slack jaw and even slacker morals, Snooper van Minge
Hit ITV talent show the X Factor has been plunged into turmoil today as shocking revelations came to light amid claims that Irish twins John and Edward cannot sing. The pair who have consistently been the best performers in the live shows [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-jedward-in-can%e2%80%99t-sing-shock/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>BUM&#8217;S THE WORD &#8211; LABOUR ANNOUNCES NEW PLANS TO TACKLE SINGLE MUM&#8217;S</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/bums-the-word-labour-announces-new-plans-to-tackle-single-mums</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/bums-the-word-labour-announces-new-plans-to-tackle-single-mums#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 02 Nov 2009 11:00:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Andy Burnham]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Britain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bum tricks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chav]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chutney locker]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dirt box]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Labour]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leeds]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Liverpool]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marmite motorway]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NHS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pregnancy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[shell suit]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[soaps]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1723</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man in Westminster, John Bollocks.
Health Secretary Andy Burnham today announced how Labour plans to tackle the mounting issue of unmarried mothers. In a radical new initiative, Mr. Burnham has called for the introduction of anal sex as an alternative method of contraception in an attempt to reduce pregnancy rates among women aged between [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/bums-the-word-labour-announces-new-plans-to-tackle-single-mums/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>X-POSED! X FACTOR TWINS SECRET DAD REVEALED</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/x-posed-x-factor-twins-scret-dad-revealed</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/x-posed-x-factor-twins-scret-dad-revealed#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 30 Oct 2009 14:47:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snooper van Minge]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vanilla Ice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[x factor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[X Factor twins]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1459</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man aghast, Snooper van Minge
As if the country wasn’t talking about them enough, shock new revelations about X Factor twins Jonathan and Edward look set to have tongues wagging even more. Startling new evidence has come to light which has revealed the twins are in fact the secret love children of 90’s rapper, [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/x-posed-x-factor-twins-scret-dad-revealed/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>MCINTYRE UNDER INVESTIGATION &#8211; ‘COMIC’ TO FACE TRADE DESCRIPTION ENQUIRY</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/mcintyre-under-investigation-%e2%80%98comic%e2%80%99-to-face-trade-description-enquiry</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/mcintyre-under-investigation-%e2%80%98comic%e2%80%99-to-face-trade-description-enquiry#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 30 Oct 2009 07:00:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[comedian]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fast-talking]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Irritating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michael McIntyre]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1454</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Boltvault Showbiz reporter, Snooper van Minge.
Irritating, fast-talking, slanty-eyed, pink shirt-wearing twat Michael McIntyre was today at the centre of an investigation by Trading Standards officers after it emerged he was attempting to portray himself as ‘funny’ and travelling the UK ‘impersonating a comedian’.
The investigation follows a complaint by Swindon resident Mr. Bert Fraggle who [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/mcintyre-under-investigation-%e2%80%98comic%e2%80%99-to-face-trade-description-enquiry/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Even Hitler Hates The X Factor Twins</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/even-hitler-hates-the-x-factor-twins</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/even-hitler-hates-the-x-factor-twins#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 Oct 2009 10:45:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1451</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Speaking exclusively to Boltvault from beyond the grave, Adolf Hitler gives his verdict on Johnathan &#38; Edward from his secret bunker in Hell.

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/even-hitler-hates-the-x-factor-twins/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Best Blonde Jokes</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/the-best-blonde-jokes</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/the-best-blonde-jokes#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Oct 2009 02:25:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/the-best-blonde-jokes</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Blonde jokes are based on the premise that people (primarily women) with blonde hair are naive, gullible, and...well, just plain stupid. You would think that this simple premise would get old - but lo and behold it does not, the best blonde jokes are alive and well in the 21st century! For some reason, like [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/the-best-blonde-jokes/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Memory</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/memory</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/memory#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Oct 2009 12:31:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1449</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I'm  not going soft, but sometimes I like these heartwarming stories, and this one  truly is amazing. 
In 1986, Dan Harrison was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern  University.
On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant  standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Dan  [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/memory/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>What makes us men</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/what-makes-us-men</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/what-makes-us-men#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Oct 2009 12:29:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1446</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[1. OPENING JARS - She's struggling. You take it from her hands, open it effortlessly and pretend she loosened it for you. She didn't. Jars are men's work.
2. CALLING SOMEONE 'SON' - Especially policeman but even saying it to kids makes you the man.
3. DOING A PROPER SLIDE TACKLE - Beckham free kicks - camp. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/what-makes-us-men/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The X Factor 2009 &#8211; Fouad Djaoublia</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/the-x-factor-2009-fouad-djaoublia</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/the-x-factor-2009-fouad-djaoublia#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 07 Sep 2009 15:28:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1247</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Welcome all the possibly the funniest I've seen in a while. The 25 year old waiter from France and now living in London came to the UK to seek his dream to record an album. All the judges are laughing their heads off by the end and the audience are on their feet singing along [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/the-x-factor-2009-fouad-djaoublia/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Lisa Jayne</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/lisa-jayne</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/lisa-jayne#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 23 Aug 2009 18:02:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boltvault babe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fashion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[glamour]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lisa jayne]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[model]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nude]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[topless]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[yorkshire]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1238</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[22 year-old Lisa has been modelling for a year and is based in Yorkshire. She has modelled in various publications and has covered glamour, topless, nude and fashion. She's 5ft 4" and supports Manchester United.
Name: Lisa Jayne
Location: Goole
Measurements: 32b
Height: 5"4
Eye Colour: Green
Hair Colour/Length: Shoulder length
Shoe size: 3/4
Dress Size: 8/10
Experience (work that is!)
What type of modelling [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/lisa-jayne/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Weird Al Yankovic &#8211; Yoda</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/weird-al-yankovic-yoda</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/weird-al-yankovic-yoda#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 19 Aug 2009 07:00:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1232</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sung to the tune of "Lola" by The Kinks, this is a classic Weird Al take-off with a Star Wars spin - very funny!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/weird-al-yankovic-yoda/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Lego Batman Trailer</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/lego-batman-trailer</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/lego-batman-trailer#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 18 Aug 2009 12:15:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1228</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[We know it's not new but it's still worth a look, check it out!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/lego-batman-trailer/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Bolt In New Sprint Sensation – Accomplishes Time Travel Feat</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/bolt-in-new-sprint-sensation-%e2%80%93-accomplishes-time-travel-feat</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/bolt-in-new-sprint-sensation-%e2%80%93-accomplishes-time-travel-feat#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 18 Aug 2009 10:08:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Athletics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Beijing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Olympic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Usain Bolt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wilf Kettle]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1221</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man at the track, Wilf Kettle
Usain Bolt has amazed the Athletics world again this morning by using his unbelievable speed to actually travel through time. It seems that after winning Olympic Gold last Summer in Beijing, a team of top scientists have been working with the Jamaican sprinter to see exactly what his [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/bolt-in-new-sprint-sensation-%e2%80%93-accomplishes-time-travel-feat/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Warnock &amp; Jordan to Take Ball Home – Not Playing Anymore</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/warnock-jordan-to-take-ball-home-%e2%80%93-not-playing-anymore</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/warnock-jordan-to-take-ball-home-%e2%80%93-not-playing-anymore#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 17 Aug 2009 14:33:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Crystal Palace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Football]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neil Warnock]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Simon Jordan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wilf Kettle]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1210</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Boltvault’s Chief Football Correspondent, Wilf Kettle.
Crystal Palace Manager Neil Warnock and his Chairman Simon Jordan have today threatened to take their ball home and not let anyone else play following a disallowed goal in their game at Bristol City at the weekend. The pair who are also considering not letting anyone play with their [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/warnock-jordan-to-take-ball-home-%e2%80%93-not-playing-anymore/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Olympic Boxing Boost – “Tissue-tastic” says Kleenex</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/olympic-boxing-boost-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9ctissue-tastic%e2%80%9d-says-kleenex</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/olympic-boxing-boost-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9ctissue-tastic%e2%80%9d-says-kleenex#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 Aug 2009 14:28:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[2012 Olympics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Greg Wad]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kleenex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Women’s Boxing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1202</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Boltvault Business Analyst Greg Wad

Tissue giants Kleenex are reportedly in line for a bumper pay day after Women’s Boxing was confirmed as an event for London’s 2012 Olympics this week. A spokesman for the company claimed the move was directly linked to the upsurge in masturbation likely to ensue as scantily clad women get [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/olympic-boxing-boost-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9ctissue-tastic%e2%80%9d-says-kleenex/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Slip and fly</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/slip-and-fly</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/slip-and-fly#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 Aug 2009 12:50:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1199</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I just had to put this up here, I saw this and just thought it was comedy!



]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/slip-and-fly/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>New Cancer Shock – Being Alive Increases Risk</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/new-cancer-shock-%e2%80%93-being-alive-increases-risk</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/new-cancer-shock-%e2%80%93-being-alive-increases-risk#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 11 Aug 2009 11:00:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cancer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cigarettes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sunbeds]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1184</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Special report by Boltvault physician, Dr. Julian Quimm.
Coming hot on the heels of the announcement this morning that an increase in oral cancer has been linked somewhat tenuously to alcohol, scientists at the privately funded Bob Cratchett Biolabs have today confirmed that not being dead can increase the risk of contracting cancer in some form [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/new-cancer-shock-%e2%80%93-being-alive-increases-risk/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>More Dr. Quimm Casefiles</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/more-dr-quimm-casefiles</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/more-dr-quimm-casefiles#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 11 Aug 2009 08:42:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1181</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Threesome Poser
Dear Dr. Quimm,
 
My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me but Im worried how this might affect our relationship. What should I do?
 
Angie Sden, Walford.
Dr. Quimm Says:
Obviously, your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/more-dr-quimm-casefiles/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Public Warned of Sunbed Terror – “They Are Out There Watching” Say Police</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/public-warned-of-sunbed-terror-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cthey-are-out-there-watching%e2%80%9d-say-police</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/public-warned-of-sunbed-terror-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cthey-are-out-there-watching%e2%80%9d-say-police#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 30 Jul 2009 07:30:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[angry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sunbeds]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1163</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man on the front line, John Bollocks.
Police have today warned the public to remain vigilant after gangs of angry young sunbeds took to the streets following accusations they were “more dangerous than tobacco”. The gangs have caused havoc in precincts and leisure centres up and down the country, destroying property and attacking innocent [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/public-warned-of-sunbed-terror-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cthey-are-out-there-watching%e2%80%9d-say-police/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Met Office Wrong Shocker – “Oops” says spokesman</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/met-office-wrong-shocker-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9coops%e2%80%9d-says-spokesman</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/met-office-wrong-shocker-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9coops%e2%80%9d-says-spokesman#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 29 Jul 2009 18:09:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Met Office]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weather]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1155</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man in a cagoule, John Bollocks
Its official, the Met Office cannot predict the weather. In a shock announcement this morning the boffins, who for decades have tried in vain to predict rain or shine, finally admitted they were a shower of shit. Having previously predicted a “barbeque summer”, the Met Office changed their [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/met-office-wrong-shocker-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9coops%e2%80%9d-says-spokesman/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>City announce latest bid</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/city-announce-latest-bid</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/city-announce-latest-bid#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 28 Jul 2009 11:08:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Football]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Manchester City]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mark Hughes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Premier League]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wilf Kettle]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1146</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Boltvault’s Chief Football correspondent, Wilf Kettle.

Big spending Manchester City are set to stun the football world yet again in this week as they continue in their attempts to buy the Premier League title. Sources at Eastlands have sensationally revealed that the City hierarchy are planning an audacious bid to sign the Brazilian, Italian and [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/city-announce-latest-bid/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Latest from the BV Post Room</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-from-the-bv-post-room</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-from-the-bv-post-room#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 28 Jul 2009 09:50:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Post Bag]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Karen Carpenter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michael Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rolling stone]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1141</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Boltvault,
The old adage states that “A rolling stone gathers no moss”. Well, I’ve had veteran rocker Mick Jagger tied up in my basement for 6 months now and let me tell you, he has all sorts of muck growing on him now. In your face old wives tales!
Tiny Tim,
Jolly Old London Town
 
Dear Boltvault,
I heard [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-from-the-bv-post-room/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Shoddy Services</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/shoddy-services</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/shoddy-services#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 28 Jul 2009 09:04:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Post Bag]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Oxford]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Welcome Break]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1136</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Boltvault,
On a recent motorway trip from Birmingham to London I heeded the advice of the Highways Agency and fearing tiredness could kill, took a requisite rest at the Welcome Break services situated at junction 8a near Oxford.
Having first battled my way through the assortment of bikers, travelling sports teams and caravan-towing pensioners in the [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/shoddy-services/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Kimberley Roberts</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/kimberley-roberts</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/kimberley-roberts#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 27 Jul 2009 21:37:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boltvault babe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kimberley Robers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leciester]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[playboy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex on the beach]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1132</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Meet Miss Kimberley Robers, our 30-26-35 beauty from Leciester. Loves spending time with her mum and friends. Ideal assignment is of course playboy, but has already done shoots for Nuts, Zoo and the Daily Sport!! Kimberley is a shopaholic, but her ideal night is to be drinking cocktails and dancing with hotties. Thats enought from [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/kimberley-roberts/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>DRUGS, HOOKERS AND BOOZE &#8211; WHAT HAPPENED NEXT TO THE CADBURY&#8217;S GORILLA</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/drugs-hookers-and-booze-what-happened-next-to-the-cadburys-gorilla</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/drugs-hookers-and-booze-what-happened-next-to-the-cadburys-gorilla#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 20 Jul 2009 20:10:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cadbury]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dave Skelton]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gorilla]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snooper van Minge]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1092</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man with a large banana, Snooper van Minge
 
He was the Gorilla with the world at his feet. A national TV star who wowed the nation with his drumming abilities but now sadly, that is a distant memory for chocolate bar front man Dave Skelton. For now instead of performing in front of sell-out [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/drugs-hookers-and-booze-what-happened-next-to-the-cadburys-gorilla/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Hayley-Marie Coppin</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/hayley-marie-coppin</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/hayley-marie-coppin#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 18 Jul 2009 16:05:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boltvault babe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boxing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cycling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Essex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hayley-Marie Coppin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[model]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[page 3]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[westham]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1071</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Meet Hayley-Marie Coppin, our Essex babe who enjoys her weekends boxing and cycling. Hayley has a very impressive CV having done assignments for Playboy, Perfect 10, Page 3, FHM, Loaded and Front! Hayley's ideal shoot would be with Playboy USA. Her ideal night out is (and we quote) "I love being taken for a meal with a [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/hayley-marie-coppin/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Grimsby Man Scoffs at Scientist Sperm Creation Claims – “Piss-Easy” claims layabout</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/grimsby-man-scoffs-at-scientist-sperm-creation-claims-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cpiss-easy%e2%80%9d-claims-layabout</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/grimsby-man-scoffs-at-scientist-sperm-creation-claims-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cpiss-easy%e2%80%9d-claims-layabout#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 Jul 2009 12:05:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Grimsby]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Newcastle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Peter Petriedish]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[scientists]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sperm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1064</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Report by Boltvault Science editor, Peter Petriedish
A man from Grimsby has poured scorn on the revelations that scientists in Newcastle have successfully created human sperm, by claiming he’s “been doing that for years”. Steve Jenkins, 29, an unemployed kitchen-fitter claims the “world first” as described by the boffins is nothing of the kind.
“Listen, I’ve been [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/grimsby-man-scoffs-at-scientist-sperm-creation-claims-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cpiss-easy%e2%80%9d-claims-layabout/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Tube Travellers Beware!</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/tube-travellers-beware</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/tube-travellers-beware#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 Jul 2009 07:00:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Post Bag]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[London Underground]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mind The Gap]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1055</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was recently using the London Underground for the first time and had an unfortunate accident at High Street Kensington. My attention was held by a sign on the platform floor warning me to 'Mind The Gap'. Unfortunately, I was so intent on reading this important safety notice that I continued walking as I read [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/tube-travellers-beware/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Latest readers letters</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-readers-letters</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-readers-letters#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 Jul 2009 12:44:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Post Bag]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Do It All]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Royal Flush]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1059</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Boltvault,
I once had a shit and when I looked down the pan I realised it looked just like the Queen of England. I suppose when I pulled the chain it was a Royal Flush!
Herr E Pie, Munich
 
Dear Boltvault,
I once dipped my 'Old Man' into a can of wood-preserver. Did it preserve it? Did it [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-readers-letters/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>New Images of Jackson &#8216;Ghost&#8217; Released!</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/new-images-of-jackson-ghost-released</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/new-images-of-jackson-ghost-released#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 13:49:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ghostly]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michael Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snooper van Minge]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1047</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man covered in ectoplasm, Snooper van Minge
New images have been released of the ghostly figure recently spotted by a film crew inside the former home of Michael Jackson. CNN footage showed a mysterious shadow, believed by some to be the King of Pop, as they filmed inside the Neverland Ranch over the weekend. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/new-images-of-jackson-ghost-released/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Dr. Quimm&#8217;s dietary tips</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimms-dietary-tips</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimms-dietary-tips#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 07:00:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1000</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Morning all and welcome once again to my surgery.
I'm regularly asked about what food people should be eating and for advice on health and fitness. Frankly I couldn't give a rat's arse because I'm a fanny magnet despite my beer gut. However, for those of you not as much of a love machine as me, here are the [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimms-dietary-tips/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Japanese National Day</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/japanese-national-day</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/japanese-national-day#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Jul 2009 07:00:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=992</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Today's lesson is about Japan. Why Japan? Because they have a National Penis Day - honest!
Take a look!
We should lobby for this day in the UK so we can pay tribute to all the dicks that run our Government!
]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/japanese-national-day/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>This probably wasn&#8217;t mentioned in the travel brochure</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/this-probably-wasnt-mentioned-in-the-travel-brochure</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/this-probably-wasnt-mentioned-in-the-travel-brochure#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 Jul 2009 11:00:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=987</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/this-probably-wasnt-mentioned-in-the-travel-brochure/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NORTHERN MONKEY ARRESTED OVER BUM TRICKERY! &#8220;I FEEL VIOLATED&#8221; SAYS IT BOFFIN</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/northern-monkey-arrested-over-bum-trickery-i-feel-violated-says-it-boffin</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/northern-monkey-arrested-over-bum-trickery-i-feel-violated-says-it-boffin#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 Jul 2009 09:37:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[utter carnage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1005</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man with the Swarfega, John Bollocks.
A man was in custody this morning after Police raided a house in the sleepy village of Chinnor in Oxfordshire. Concerned neighbors raised the alarm after a series of distressed screams were heard from within the property. Upon entry to the house, officers were greeted by a scene [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/northern-monkey-arrested-over-bum-trickery-i-feel-violated-says-it-boffin/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>EXCLUSIVE! “Cars better than feet – can get you there quicker” claims report</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-%e2%80%9ccars-better-than-feet-%e2%80%93-can-get-you-there-quicker%e2%80%9d-claims-report</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-%e2%80%9ccars-better-than-feet-%e2%80%93-can-get-you-there-quicker%e2%80%9d-claims-report#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Jun 2009 19:09:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[British Association of Car Manufacturers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cars]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[walking]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1024</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man at the wheel, John Bollocks.
Cars can get you to your destination quicker than so-called cheaper alternatives such as walking – FACT! That’s the shocking revelation in a new report issued today which claims to have proven unequivocally that cars really can get you there faster.
The report commissioned by the British Association of [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-%e2%80%9ccars-better-than-feet-%e2%80%93-can-get-you-there-quicker%e2%80%9d-claims-report/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>RESIDENTS STUNNED AT SORDID SEX REVELATIONS.</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/residents-stunned-at-sordid-sex-revelations</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/residents-stunned-at-sordid-sex-revelations#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Jun 2009 16:10:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Aylesbury]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sexual]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Watermead]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1020</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[“RANDOM STINKFINGERING RIFE” SAYS POLICE CHIEF. Report by John Bollocks.
The residents of a well to do area of Aylesbury, Bucks were said to be shocked yesterday, after a Police raid on a flat in the upper crust Watermead area of the town revealed a series of sordid sexual practices. The owner of the aforementioned abode [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/residents-stunned-at-sordid-sex-revelations/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Murray injury scare – Star rushed to Hospital</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/murray-injury-scare-%e2%80%93-star-rushed-to-hospital</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/murray-injury-scare-%e2%80%93-star-rushed-to-hospital#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Jun 2009 11:54:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Andrew Murray]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snooper van Minge]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wimbledon]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=1014</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man with his balls in his hands, Snooper van Minge
There were fears this morning that Andrew Murray’s Wimbledon dream could be over after the tennis ace was rushed to hospital in the early hours. While Murray Mania swept across the country in the wake of last night’s defeat of Stanistas Wawrinka, the young [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/murray-injury-scare-%e2%80%93-star-rushed-to-hospital/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Priceless</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/priceless</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/priceless#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Jun 2009 11:00:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=980</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Football boots - £100
Socks - £20
Leg Waxing - £50
White Away Champions league jersey - £40
Standing in front of an advertising hoarding at the right time to describe yourself.............................................. Priceless
 
]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/priceless/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>A man who looks like a thumb!</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/a-man-who-looks-like-a-thumb</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/a-man-who-looks-like-a-thumb#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 29 Jun 2009 11:52:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[man]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[thumb]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=929</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There's really no more to say than that - he actually looks like a thumb!
 

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/a-man-who-looks-like-a-thumb/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Middle of the night humour</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/middle-of-the-night-humour</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/middle-of-the-night-humour#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 29 Jun 2009 11:07:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=926</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside.
The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man "Holy crap. That must be my husband!"
So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/middle-of-the-night-humour/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The good doctor speaks again!</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/the-good-doctor-speaks-again</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/the-good-doctor-speaks-again#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 29 Jun 2009 09:40:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=922</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Dr. Quimm,
I don’t normally write in for help but I’m afraid to say that I’m really struggling and need your advice.
I’ve been married for 7 years and I think my wife is up to no good.
Why, you may ask?  Well there are all the usual tell tale signs.
Basically for the last 6 months, things [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/the-good-doctor-speaks-again/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Wiper blade safety</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/wiper-blade-safety</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/wiper-blade-safety#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 29 Jun 2009 09:13:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=916</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[New Wipers
I got a new set of wiper blades on my car (a Peugeot, made in France ).  I think they might be too big because they hang over the edges a little, but I don't care, they work great and I would have to say that they are the only blades I have ever [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/wiper-blade-safety/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NEW! The Baultvault Babysitter</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/new-the-baultvault-babysitter</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/new-the-baultvault-babysitter#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 27 Jun 2009 08:00:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Ads]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Baultvault Babysitter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boffins]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Engineering]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[night out]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=846</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Yes that's right folks, those boffins at Boltvault Engineering have done it again. In a joint venture with the makers of Stella Artois, the beer that's reassuringly expensive, we have come up with the answer to all your problems at a price that suits you.
Before leaving on a night out, simply hook up your child [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/new-the-baultvault-babysitter/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Chef&#8217;s Arse</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/chefs-arse</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/chefs-arse#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Jun 2009 08:00:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=829</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Dr. Quimm,
Could you please furnish me with the correct definitions of firstly 'Chefs Arse', and secondly a 'Kleberson'. Are they the same? Also, what are 'Clinkers', 'Chob Nuts', 'Tag Bolts' and 'Undercarriage Urchins?
Roger Bhouys, France
Dr Quimm Says:
Dear Roger. Let me firstly deal with Chefs Arse. This is caused by an excess of ringstingic acid [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/chefs-arse/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Please Dr. Quimm, can you help?</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/please-dr-quimm-can-you-help</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/please-dr-quimm-can-you-help#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 22 Jun 2009 07:00:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=826</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Dr. Quimm,
I have particularly long arse cress and suffer from an uncomfortable build up of clinkers. Trimming the hair seems to make it grow faster and I now have to put it in a bun, which makes my buttocks look lopsided.
Any suggestions?
A. Nuss
Bourneville Boulevard
Dr Quimm says:

I find the best remedy for this is to [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/please-dr-quimm-can-you-help/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Davina McCall bursts own ear drums – ‘Star’ hospitalised</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/davina-mccall-bursts-own-ear-drums-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%98star%e2%80%99-hospitalised</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/davina-mccall-bursts-own-ear-drums-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%98star%e2%80%99-hospitalised#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 21 Jun 2009 21:50:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Big Brother]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Davina McCall]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[shitting dog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snooper van Minge]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=898</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man who couldn’t give a toss, Snooper van Minge

Big Brother presenter and part-time foghorn Davina McCall has been admitted to hospital after bursting her own ear drums while shouting. The ‘star’ was rushed to hospital after Friday night’s show which saw some celebrity-hungry, mentally challenged freak of nature evicted from the Big Brother [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/davina-mccall-bursts-own-ear-drums-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%98star%e2%80%99-hospitalised/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>EXCLUSIVE! Susan Boyle revealed as Clarkson’s long-lost sister</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-susan-boyle-revealed-as-clarkson%e2%80%99s-long-lost-sister</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-susan-boyle-revealed-as-clarkson%e2%80%99s-long-lost-sister#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 20 Jun 2009 12:28:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Britain’s Got Talent]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jeremy Clarkson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Susan Boyle]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=869</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man wide-eyed and open-mouthed, Snooper van Minge.
The showbiz world was rocked to its very core last night by the announcement that Britain’s Got Talent star Susan Boyle is the long-lost sister of outspoken journalist and TV presenter, Jeremy Clarkson.
It seems the real reason for Ms.Boyle recently missing a show on the Britain’s Got [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/exclusive-susan-boyle-revealed-as-clarkson%e2%80%99s-long-lost-sister/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Dear Boltvault</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/dear-boltvault</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/dear-boltvault#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 20 Jun 2009 10:19:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Post Bag]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Amazon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fake]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[made up]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=841</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Each week we receive literally no emails from you so we've made some up!
If you are able to find the time between searching for grot and pretending to look at Amazon when your bird catches you mid-stroke, and you do want to send us a mail, fire it through to the usual address admin@boltvault.com
Dear Boltvault,
I wish [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/dear-boltvault/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Dr. Quimm offers more advice</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimm-offers-more-advice</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimm-offers-more-advice#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 20 Jun 2009 09:21:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=819</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Dr. Quimm,
 
I've been seeing this tart for a while now and she is proper filth, I mean the blonde bird out of Girls Aloud filth. She lets me do all sorts to her and is forever asking me to try different things with her from Golden Showers to Tarmacking. But the one thing we [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/dr-quimm-offers-more-advice/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Boltvault Klegaway &#8211; can you live without it?</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/the-boltvault-klegaway-can-you-live-without-it</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/the-boltvault-klegaway-can-you-live-without-it#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 20 Jun 2009 09:07:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Ads]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[arse rolos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Boltvault]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[clinkers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Klegaway]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[klegnuts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[winnets]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=795</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[No matter whether it's a first date, an interview or a TV debut, as the old adage goes, you only get one chance to make a first impression. So, if the situation is this important the last thing you need is to be suffering with klegnuts. In the past, countless careers have been ruined by [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/the-boltvault-klegaway-can-you-live-without-it/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Latest from Troy &#8211; Chuck your Muck!</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-from-troy-chuck-your-muck</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-from-troy-chuck-your-muck#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 20 Jun 2009 07:56:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Troy the 70's Porn Star]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=790</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hi guys, Troy the Seventies Porn star here. Welcome to the next instalment of Who’s the Daddy?  I will now inform you of the next act for you to try to see which one of you and your mates can be crowned as good as Troy the Seventies porn king, oh yeah!
 
Chucking your muck
 
Gone are [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/latest-from-troy-chuck-your-muck/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Ronaldo to Real in £80m deal</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/ronaldo-to-real-in-80m-deal</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/ronaldo-to-real-in-80m-deal#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 11 Jun 2009 11:07:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christiano Ronaldo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Manchester United]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wilf Kettle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[£80 million]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=762</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Boltvault’s chief sports correspondent, Wilf Kettle.
Manchester United have today confirmed they have accepted a bid of £80 million for Portuguese winger Christiano Ronaldo. The greasy, sulky, cheating little twat has repeatedly requested a move during his time at United but, due to a recent increase in child-like tantrum throwing and Real Madrid’s gross over-estimation [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/ronaldo-to-real-in-80m-deal/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Villagers in dive for cover as fireball hits</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/villagers-in-dive-for-cover-as-fireball-hits</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/villagers-in-dive-for-cover-as-fireball-hits#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 08 Jun 2009 07:00:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Buckinghamshire]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Haddenham]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Bollocks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mark Stow]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=721</guid>
		<description><![CDATA["I only tried to say hello" says local youth.
Report by our man with a yellow helmet, John Bollocks
Residents of the sleepy Buckinghamshire village of Haddenham, enjoying a quiet lunchtime walk or a sociable pint of real ale, were soon rushing for cover as an explosion at a petrol station tore through their picturesque village. The [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/villagers-in-dive-for-cover-as-fireball-hits/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Tom Carr &#8211; struggling with his sexuality</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/tom-carr-struggling-with-his-sexuality</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/tom-carr-struggling-with-his-sexuality#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 06 Jun 2009 10:24:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fishing trip]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sexuality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tom Carr]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=733</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Dr. Quimm,
I’m worried about a friend of mine, Tom Carr as I feel he may be struggling with his sexuality.
My suspicions were aroused last month while on a fishing trip to France. I knew it was going to be quiet but I didn't realise we were going to be miles away from any women. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/tom-carr-struggling-with-his-sexuality/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Snare Drum Syndrome</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/snare-drum-syndrome</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/snare-drum-syndrome#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Jun 2009 15:54:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=725</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Doctor Quimm,

I wish to remain anonymous but can disclose my name rhymes with Hen.
I have this problem… ever since I can remember I have been likened to a ginger mincing midget from an 80’s pop band who can reach notes only those missing testicles can. The identity of this dancing dandy will become apparent [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/snare-drum-syndrome/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Sir Alan Sugar in a right Carry On</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/sir-alan-sugar-in-a-right-carry-on</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/sir-alan-sugar-in-a-right-carry-on#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Jun 2009 12:33:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Apprentice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sir Alan Sugar]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snooper van Minge]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=714</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By our man under the boardroom table, Snooper van Minge.
The final of this years Apprentice show has been thrown into doubt after allegations of sexual harassment by the two remaining contestants. Finalists Kate Walsh and Yasmina Siadatan were said to be shocked and appalled by the behaviour of Sir Alan Sugar who after the pair [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/sir-alan-sugar-in-a-right-carry-on/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>New twist in search for Lost flight</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/new-twist-in-search-for-lost-flight</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/new-twist-in-search-for-lost-flight#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Jun 2009 11:48:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lost]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=700</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Investigators into the missing Air France flight which disappeared on Monday have released details of a new line of enquiry. Officials for the airline today announced they were on the hunt for a mysterious island which has the capability to relocate at a given time and on which they believe the flight may have crash [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/new-twist-in-search-for-lost-flight/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Snatch Wars (Snatch Vs Star Wars)</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/snatch-wars-snatch-vs-star-wars</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/snatch-wars-snatch-vs-star-wars#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Jun 2009 17:44:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[snatch wars]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[star wars]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[video]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=686</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I had to put this on the site!!! Very funny!

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/snatch-wars-snatch-vs-star-wars/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NikkiLee</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/nikkilee</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/nikkilee#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Jun 2009 17:15:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=679</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Meet naughty Essex girl NikkiLee. NikkiLee has done various types of modelling including topless, glamour mags, papers and car shows but says her dream assignment would be a photo shoot with Jordan and all the Boltvault lads watching! Her ideal night out would be a Limo followed by London nightlife and Nikki is another Boltvault [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/nikkilee/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Michelle Westby</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/michelle-westby</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/michelle-westby#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Jun 2009 17:04:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=670</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Let us introduce you to our newest girl - Michelle!! This Hertfordshire beauty likes McDonalds for her ideal night out, which surprises us as her stats 26-32-34 say otherwise! Michelle has done promotion work for Time Attack, BSB, USC and many professional shoots. Michelle's football team is Arsenal and she plays the drums. We'll try [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/michelle-westby/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Candy</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/candy</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/candy#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Jun 2009 14:14:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Babes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=666</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is Candy. Candy's dream assignment would be a shoot in L.A, or somewhere hot we imagine. Candy is into fitness, food, pampering and fair grounds, yet her ideal night out includes pubs, clubs and a kebab for after, perfect! Candy supports Spurs and her stats include some 34dd's!
Name: Candy
Location: Deal, Kent
Measurements: 34 DD
Height: 5ft [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/candy/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Exceedingly Poor Cakes</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/exceedingly-poor-cakes</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/exceedingly-poor-cakes#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 14 May 2009 06:35:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mr. Kipling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Trade Descriptions Act]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=613</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A Grimbsy man claims he is "fighting the good fight" by taking on the fiscal might of renowned cake manufacturer Mr. Kipling. Lionel Doorknob, 69, a retired hamster farmer is suing the purveyor of French Fancies under the Trade Descriptions Act following an incident at his home last month,
Mr. Doorknob claims he brought a Mr. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/exceedingly-poor-cakes/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>United Duo In Champions League Blow</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/united-duo-in-champions-league-blow</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/united-duo-in-champions-league-blow#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 13 May 2009 07:54:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Champions League]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christiano Ronaldo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Manchester United]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=602</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hot on the heels of last weeks Champions League controversy, Manchester United duo Wayne Rooney and Christiano Ronaldo are the latest players set to face the music after pictures were released of the pair doing more than simply bonding as team mates.
Our exclusive picture shows the pair celebrating their 4-1 win over Arsenal by apparently [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/united-duo-in-champions-league-blow/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Peter &amp; Katie : The Split Which Effects A Nation</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/peter-katie-the-split-which-effects-a-nation</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/peter-katie-the-split-which-effects-a-nation#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 12 May 2009 12:13:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Katie Price]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Peter Andre]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[split]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=573</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Boltvault showbiz reporter Snooper Van Minge
The showbiz world was plunged into deep, dark depression last night with the devastating news that pop has-been Peter Andre and balloon-breasted bimbo Katie Price are to end the tumultuous, yet heart-warming marriage which has captured the imagination of a nation.
For reasons as yet unknown, 90’s ‘pop star’ Andre [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/peter-katie-the-split-which-effects-a-nation/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Test Every That Man Should Take</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/the-test-every-that-man-should-take</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/the-test-every-that-man-should-take#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 11 May 2009 08:00:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=541</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[That's right fella's. if there's ever been any doubt at all that you might not be a red-blooded, chick-loving, boob-worshipping bloke, you should take the test below!
&#160;
]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/the-test-every-that-man-should-take/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Coffee Mate and more&#8230;..</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/coffee-mate-and-more</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/coffee-mate-and-more#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 08 May 2009 18:59:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=532</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady at the coffee machine, inhales a deep breath of air, and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this, the woman can't stand it anymore. She takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and asks to file [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/coffee-mate-and-more/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Champions League of Villains</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/champions-league-of-villains</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/champions-league-of-villains#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 07 May 2009 14:11:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russell</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chelsea]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Football]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Frank Lampard]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=521</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[UEFA today moved to dismiss rumours that referee Tom Henning Ovrebo who officiated over last night’s controversial Champions League semi-final is in fact a Barcelona fan. Ovrebo, 99, incensed players and fans alike with a string of dubious decisions which contributed towards Chelsea’s eventual exit from the competition following a 93rd minute equaliser by Barca’s [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/champions-league-of-villains/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NEW! from Boltvault Ads</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/the-boltvault-wank-away-masturbation-system</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/the-boltvault-wank-away-masturbation-system#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 05 May 2009 21:35:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Boltvault Ads]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bog Roll]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wank-Away Masturbation System]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=506</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[That's right folks; the same team that brought you Boltvault Bog Roll now offers you this unique receptacle to wipe away those wanking worries!

Ergonomically designed for the left or right-handed wrister, the Wank-Away Masturbation System's pioneering design has been secretly tested, is fully endorsed by scientists at NASA and will feature on all future space [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/the-boltvault-wank-away-masturbation-system/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Rascal Rabbit</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/rascal-rabbit</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/rascal-rabbit#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 05 May 2009 08:00:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=485</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Dr. Quimm,
I have an embarrassing problem. A couple of days ago I was playing with my pet rabbit (the battery operated variety) when I got a bit carried away. I inserted the the aforementioned item so far it became irretrievable. The problem is that it's still switched on and I can't leave the house [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/rascal-rabbit/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Back Wank</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/the-back-wank</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/the-back-wank#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 04 May 2009 08:00:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Troy the 70's Porn Star]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=483</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ 
Hi guys, Troy the 70's Porn Star here with more advice on how you too can become the ultimate stud like me, oh yeah!
Today is lesson number 2 - The Back Wank.
OK guys, the net time you go back to a chick's house, end up in bed with her and nothing happens (something which has [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/the-back-wank/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Hairy Bush</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/hairy-bush</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/hairy-bush#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 03 May 2009 12:07:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dr Quimm]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=491</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Dr. Quimm,
I met this bloke once in a pub and we ended up back at my place. Unfortunately after he had rubbinsed me to get my juices flowing he pulled down my kecks and his previously magnificent tumescence dwindled to something resembling an elastic band. Can you tell me what might have caused this [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/hairy-bush/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Poo&#8217;s in trouble now? Toilet tomfoolery ends in tears.</title>
		<link>http://www.boltvault.com/poos-in-trouble-now-toilet-tomfoolery-ends-in-tears</link>
		<comments>http://www.boltvault.com/poos-in-trouble-now-toilet-tomfoolery-ends-in-tears#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 03 May 2009 10:50:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Boltvault Admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Random]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.boltvault.com/?p=476</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Report by our man in marigolds, John Bollocks.
Male members of staff at an accountancy firm are counting the cost of their unruly bottoms after their toilet gave up the ghost and exploded. Men at Mi5er Accountancy in Guildford, Surrey excelled so much at producing powerful plops that the strain has taken its toll on their terrorised [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.boltvault.com/poos-in-trouble-now-toilet-tomfoolery-ends-in-tears/feed</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
	</channel>
</rss>
