NEW ELECTION POLICIES UNVEILED

By our man in Westminster, John Bollocks.   As the build up to a General Election starts to hot up, the major parties have today unveiled the policies they hope will see them elected. This morning Tory leader David Cameron told waiting journalists his... (more...)

NEW GOVERNMENT PLANS ON CLIMATE CHANGE ANNOUNCED – ‘KILL THEM ALL’ SAY MINISTERS

By our woman in Westminster, Selina Clownspocket. The government has today announced revolutionary new plans to cut CO2 emissions and reduce the UK’s carbon footprint. Following a two-year study by the University of Leamington Spa, Government ministers... (more...)

BUM’S THE WORD – LABOUR ANNOUNCES NEW PLANS TO TACKLE SINGLE MUM’S

By our man in Westminster, John Bollocks. Health Secretary Andy Burnham today announced how Labour plans to tackle the mounting issue of unmarried mothers. In a radical new initiative, Mr. Burnham has called for the introduction of anal sex as an alternative... (more...)